A "Mind Expanding" trip to Key West

Years ago, in land far far away called Fort Lauderdale, there was a naive young sailor who was stepping off an aircraft carrier for fleet week. He had a couple buddies who lived in the area pick him up for a couple beers. Soon a couple turned into seven or eight and they were off to Key West for a day on a druken whim.
Three hours later they stepped out on the overcast streets of key west looking for a good time at "Sloppy Joe's". It was a fairly low key bar in the middle of the island, but these boys were looking for something slightly more stimulating than low key.
Fifteen beers later they giddily stepped back out onto the street to take in the scene and look for some trouble. Trouble found them in the form of a homeless guy with a sea weathered look about him. His fingernails were black and his hands bore caluses over an inch in width. He proceeded to tell them that he had just what they were looking for. I won't bore you with details, but we'll just say it was mighty popular in the sixty's, and Key West.
The rest of the night sped up and blurred together. This wayward sailor had just embarked on quite the adventure. Before all was said and done Key West had felt the impact of the visist to the tune of three huge bar tabs, one broken window, one trashed hotel room, and one stolen moped.
When day dawned the next morning, this young gentleman found himself aimlessly wandering the streets in a torrential down pour. Friendless, with no clue who or where he was he simply walked on. Luckily for him, he got a fortuitous visit from an old friend. You guessed it. The ragged gentleman from the evening before informed him that he knew exactly where the young man could find his partners in crime. But before that, would he like to meet "the captain".
Turns out this guy was part of a drug ship crew that ran back and forth from Cuba, and the captain was their fearless leader. Not being in the greatest state of mind, he joins the crew and embarks on a pleasure cruise with the strangest "homeless" people of all time. The strange captain regals him with thoeries of how time travel is possible and the fastest sea route to Cuba.
Out in the open sea(about a half mile)the conversation took a turn for the worst. No I don't mean worse. The crew becomes enamored with tales of keelhauling. This is apperently a practice of throwing unsuspecting idiot Navy guys overboard and leaving them to fend for theirself.
A strong half mile swim later, off the island of Key West during shark season, he drags his half dead body onto the shore. As he raises his gaze from the water to the shore line, he grabs his first tiny bit of good luck for the entire trip: its the hotel where his amigos and he had rented to crash in the night before.
They had apparently already checked the hospitals and police stations. They were in fact handing in the room key to the leave island forever. As beaten military man trudged to the hotel office he ran into the group. A smile, shake of the head, and some keys in the ignition was all the explantion necessary.